Vote For Change
Every apple, every spoonful of cereal, every time we the people fall hard into a big fluffy snowbank: the same damn thing. We need change, dammit, and the sooner the better.
I'm not talking about bloody coup or neck-slitting junta here, just SOMETHING new. We are men, not machines, and a steady diet of the same blurs that line disturbingly well. I think you know what I'm talking about, and when the revolution comes, remember my platform:
As emperor of the land, I will banish all crunching sounds. From that day forward, apples will WHISTLE when we bite them.